Welcome Back, Tigh & Sarah; For Tiger Woods, John Mayer & more, scroll down…
Sarah Kowalski and Tigh Rickman are respectively a graduate of, and a candidate at Stonecoast MFA. Both longtime fans of reality television, they are both relative newcomers to ABC’s The Bachelor. However, much like crack cocaine, it only took a small hit to hook them both, and now both watch religiously with their fiction writers’ eyes.
This week Jake and the three remaining Bachelorettes (Gia, Vienna and Tenley) traveled to St Lucia for the much-anticipated Fantasy Suite Dates. After a day long, individual date with each of the remaining lovely ladies, Jake had the option of offering them the key to the Fantasy Suite, where dreams can come true. But there was trouble in paradise as Ali, the former frontrunner who just last week chose her career over Jake and left the show, called our hero, begging to return.
Tigh: So another banner week for Jake is in the books. He got to parade around St. Lucia like he owned the place, got to rake a heartbroken Ali over the coals for her decision to choose her job over maybe, almost, possibly getting a chance to be with him and last but most certainly not least, he batted 1.000 in the Fantasy Suite department, gaining carnal knowledge of all three remaining bachelorettes. Not bad for a week’s work.
Sarah: To be fair, we didn’t see what went on behind closed doors. I’m pretty sure Vienna put out, what with that negligee she busted, but Tenley and Gia seemed a bit more guarded… I’m not certain full-on carnal knowledge was gained. Perhaps some base hits for our batter, not all homers? But maybe I’m just telling myself that because picturing Jake in the sack gives me the squicks, so I’d rather pretend it didn’t happen.
Tigh: Agreed. That image is nothing if not searing.
Tigh: We didn’t talk too much about Gia last week; she was kind of in the background. But I think this week her date was the most interesting as it gave us our first (and only) glance of Jake in a public setting, outside of the manicured world of The Bachelor. We got to see our hero doing the classic ‘White Guy from Texas Booty Dance’ in the street and interacting with many ‘common’ St. Lucians in a street market. It was uncomfortably awkward to watch Jake use his patented squinty, ‘I’m trying hard to look sincerely interested in what you’re saying’ look on someone other than a bachelorette. Talk about a guy not engaged with his surroundings. A total tourist. (more…)


